6 months...

Time does fly...
It's been almost 6 months since I decide to fly away. Run from my ghosts, if you may. I try to see the whole point to all this and the more I search for one the more I realize that there is none. I'm running from myself, and I'm not doing a good job at it. For he who is I is always present, he stares back at me every time I see a reflection of myself.
I try to confuse him by changing my appearance, yet he always finds me. Even mocks me by dressing up in the same clothes. I hear a voice that haunts me every time, only to find that there is noone else but myself...

I do understand that the decisions I make in the next couple of days, as well as the events that will trigger will define me for a long time. How can I choose to do the 'right' thing, even those decision will have big repercussion in the long run. It's like one of those 'choose you own adventure' books which I loved to read as a child, but this time the main character is me. There is no going back to page one and start over in this tale.

They say the most dangerous of animals are those who are injured and cornered, and right now I am both. Not only am I dangerous(not in the violent way), but if I have learned anything about myself(maybe the only thing I know) is that, when I'm on the verge of losing it all is when I'm at my finest.

I've seen myself in this point before, with nothing to lose but my sanity. It's those moments when the real me comes out of its shell and does the unthinkable, the unexpected, and shines as bright as the sun. For when I have nothing left to lose, the only way I can go is forward...

No matter what I do from this point on, I will not regret it, ever. For there is nothing more I can lose, except myself.